More Of Ambers Diaries. Written by her Mum Christine Robinson Twinkle (June to July 2014)

amber11 June

Google search Amber’s Autism Awareness and Amber’s pic comes up first as well as loads of our other stuff!

There is more than one campaign with the same name so thanks to all the interaction and blogs my princess is top!

Quote from Ken. We are doing something right Christine.

6 June

The shopping trip – this is the best examples of Amber’s autism I have ever been able to post as both extremes of her capabilities happened in the same place.

As you may have seen we’ve been tackling her “privacy” and getting her to realise not everyone should see everything.

This took a slight step back as she decided to lift her skirt and flash most of Morley round the supermarket! Our next autism happening was very different….we bought a new car CD and I’d given it to her to look at when I picked one, she looked at it for around 20 seconds and put it in the trolley.

There’s 40 odd songs 20 odd on both disks. So we get in the car and I put a CD in. Number 1 starts playing and half a line has sang when she requests I put another number on!

The number she asked for was one of her favourites and of course she wanted it repeated. From crushing embarrassment to jaw hitting the floor in the space of an hour!

15 June

It’s Father’s Day and Amber is definitely a daddy’s girl and Paul is her bestest friend.

She’s very lucky to have 2 good male role models who get on and have her best interests at heart. They even bought each other Father’s Day gifts. How blended are we!

19 June

Amber has been home an hour and so far I’ve been pushed, thumped, slapped and generally ragged around. Why? I honestly have no clue.

The sadness in her face tells me there’s something wrong but she can’t say what … She will attack me and then cry “it’s alright, it’s alright Amber Wood is happy” she knows happy is better than what she is right now so tries 5comforting me by telling me so while still trying to hurt me.

That all sounds a little confused because it is. I want to immediately comfort my soggy faced 7 year old cute as little girl, while flinching every time she surges.

She doesn’t want to leave me and actively follows me around. She’s sweating, hair wet from tears and completely agitated.

Nothing is breaking this state and we tried, she doesn’t want to do her favourite things, ignoring enrages her more and asking what’s wrong doesn’t get a response, me telling her I’m sad/cross/hurt doesn’t matter.

A puffed up hand and bruise on my back where I’ve tried to dodge a whack is what we’re left with as well as a subdued if slightly irritated Amber Wood. Meltdowns are no fun, but they happen…..

20 June

Chatty Bam – since I opened my eyes this morning Amber has chatted and sang all day at home…3 little pigs, playing teachers, singing all kinds of songs …I like these days as they are still quite rare

20 June

Violence – Amber’s violent behaviour often leaves me conflicted. You look at her and it’s not an action anyone would immediately think of. She’s 7, half my size and can do me some damage when she starts,

I’ve had cut arms, a million bruises, pulled out hair, bust lip/nose and been knocked on my backside.

I understand completely that the filter the rest of us have where we can control the amount of strength we use doesn’t happen with her.

To experience a child who can literally see red and loose it for a prolonged amount of time isn’t ever a happy occasion.

There’s days where she’s like a caged bear that hasn’t been fed for a month and stalks round the house with the slightest thing making her fly off the handle.

The switch from fine to distressed comes often without warning. Many households have this same experience with their children and it comes with the autism…it’s something we have to accept and try understand, the periods where we are at a complete loss are hard on everyone. Amber included. It’s a reality and the harshest symptom.

427 June

I often joke amber is better managed than most famous stars, it is quite true though.

She likes certain cups to drink out of, certain food and won’t eat others. Will only wear certain clothing and expects things when she expects them.

The difference is she relies on these things to stay calm, to control little things where bigger things get too much for her.

We manage her by allowing her to pick and choose stuff and making sure she has it when she requires it. We also emphasise emotions, how we speak to her and training her social skills.

We do it cos she needs it not because she wants it.

4 July

Triggers – one of Amber’s niggles is when you leave the lid up on the toilet. When I say niggles I mean it causes her to explode uncontrollably. After a massive meltdown she’s calm.

I’m slightly worse for wear mind!

Mood swings – the past couple of days we’ve gone from super hyper happy to extra mad and irritable … Being prominently bossy throughout!

6 July

Shopping – so we’ve had many different experiences in the supermarket, but today was totally different. Amber knows what she wants which is fine, but she had a full on meltdown when we put other things in the trolley!

This went in until we got her sat in the car to go home! No idea where this idea of not buying things has come from and hoping that was the only time it’s going to bother her!


More from Ambers Diaries next Month. Above diaries edited by Kenneth Ingram.