In last month’s article, we dived into the magic of loving, supportive friendships—the kind that lift us up, cheer us on, and make us feel like we can conquer the world with their support.
But what happens when a friendship or relationship no longer feels like that? When instead of adding joy and light to your life, it starts weighing you down and you begin to dread your next interaction with them.
This month, let’s talk about the other side of the coin: letting go of toxic people and why it’s so important for your mental health.
First off, we’ve all been there. We’ve all had a person that once felt like a perfect fit but over time, the dynamic became draining, stressful, or even harmful. Maybe you outgrew each other. Maybe the relationship shifted into something negative or uncomfortable. It’s tough because there’s history and memories, often we stay in these situations out of guilt, loyalty or loneliness. But here’s the thing: all relationships, romantic, familial, friendships or work connections, can have an expiration date, and that’s okay.
Moving on from a toxic relationship doesn’t necessarily mean there’s something wrong with you or them—it just means you’re prioritising your well-being. Holding onto unhealthy relationships can lead to anxiety, worry, self-esteem issues, and emotional exhaustion. Our mental health thrives on positive, supportive, thoughtful connections that can be relied upon in good times and bad.
But when you no longer feel that’s a two way thing, how do you let go with grace? It’s not about making a big dramatic exit, ghosting someone, or burning bridges. You can distance yourself gradually, with kindness and respect.
Maybe it’s spending less time together or better yet, (if you feel safe to do so), having an honest, open conversation about why the relationship isn’t working for you anymore. It doesn’t have to be messy. In fact, it can be a long overdue, powerful act of self-care — an acknowledgment that you deserve better. Relationships that nurture and energise you, not ones that drain you and leave you constantly second guessing yourself about where it all went wrong.
Who knows they might feel the same way, and speaking might clear the air helping you find a way to move forwards together.
But even if that doesn’t happen, remember that letting go doesn’t mean erasing the good times you’ve shared, and it’s certainly not about holding grudges, that will only hurt you. It’s about recognising when a relationship is no longer viable having the courage to step away. Sometimes, growing apart is part of life, and that’s nothing to be ashamed of.
Removing yourself from toxic situations clears space for relationships that truly make you feel valued. It’s not selfish—it’s essential.
Shannon Humphrey is a First Aid for Mental Health Instructor working in the community, with schools, colleges and businesses find out more about her work at www. pathwaysforpositivity.com
Photo: Shutterstock
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