Got permission from Christine Robinson Twinkle to add this (Amber’s Mum) to Amber’s Autism diary.
Very Emotional diary. I have put this in isolation to other Daily Diary’s. This one day sums up what its like to be Christine, Amber and her family.
Quote above by Kenneth Ingram
March 2014. I’m sat contemplating whether I want to share this and then I remember I’m an awareness machine so here goes….this morning was by far THE worst morning we’ve ever had.
Everyone gets up and for the millionth time Amber begins to attack Halen. I’m trying to stop her, Halen is screaming, Amber is laughing…and then it happens. Halen after months of these snaps. He goes for her back. I’m shocked, Amber’s still laughing, Halen is shaking. I send him into the kitchen to calm down and tell him not to hit his sister. Yep after months of being constantly harassed I tell him not to hit his sister.
I start to get Amber dressed, she’s still laughing and then I feel so guilty that I’ve told him off and then guilty cos he’s been pushed to this point. Then I start crying and then Halen is crying. He leaves for school tear stained and Amber is late cos I’m literally sobbing that I’ve messed this up so badly.
I drop Amber off and ask school if they can check on Halen, then I start crying again. This isn’t the easiest thing to share, but this scenario isn’t unusual for a family like ours, so I’ve put it out there. You might think “well it’s kids for you, brothers and sisters fight all the time” but this isn’t your usual sibling spat. It’s not like I can ground them or take something away and it will stop. I can’t chastise them both equally because Amber doesn’t understand fully the effect of her actions. I can’t tell Halen that she will stop now because I’ve shouted at her, I can’t give him a certainty that she will stop anytime soon. I’m going to recharge my batteries while they’re at school and hope we will have a break from it tonight at least.